Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Wings of Love

It's been 2 years,
insisted of being myself, I am Han Geng.
In the far future, you're always be in my heart and will always be included in my dreams.
I love you!
-translation from HanGeng's weibo update (Dec 21)

How time flies. It's already been 2 years since he left. I remember how devastated I was when he made a desicion to put an end to everything 2 years ago. Idk who's that 'you' in his latest entry but I'm kinda sure he's referring to his other 14 brothers. It's great to see and know that he still remember about them. I don't want to write sth like 'I hope he come back or I'll wait for him forever' yadda yadda because let's just be honest to ourselves, we know it won't happen. The chances for him to be back with us is just 1.0%? idk. Let's just hope the best for him as he looks so happy with what he's doing now.

Remember that we'll never leave your side, Geng. No matter where you are and who you are now. Because you're still our Chinese man Hankyung that we know 6 years ago.


Mom : *comes into my room and sits beside me in my bed*
Ahhh Super Junior *points to my Boys In City Photobook*
Me : Hehe yeah.
Mom : Is this what you bought the other day?
Me : *nods nods*
Mom : Keep it carefully then so that you can show all these stuff to your children later *grins*

My mom, guys.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

that's how things go

Because that's live. No matter how much you want to see that person in your life, even just for once or just for a freaking second, if it's not meant to be, so you won't. You won't meet them.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Sometimes I wish I were a little kid again, skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts.

things are never gonna be the same again.

I was a bit hesitated whether to stream Sukira or not tonight because I'm pretty sure what is going to happen if I do but after 5 minutes the prog started, I decided to just face it and try my hardest to cherish the last moment of the two DJs.

I can already feel the lump in my throat when they played the first song for tonight which is Memories (yeah, of all songs ;_;) but then I just ignored it since they looked so happy and their faces were all like 8DDD fooling with each other and all. They spent most of the 2 hours talking and reliving what had happened in these last 5 years and 3 months. From the very first day they started DJ-ing until today. Everything went smoothly until they played Tablo's No Tomorrow and I suddenly saw Hyukjae sobbing beside Jungsoo. He obviously can't control his emotions any longer when Jungsoo finally gave his goodbye kiss to the listeners. Their last goodbye kiss. From that moment onward I started shedding tears as the sight of Hyukjae with his head bending low on the table is so heartbreaking. Idk, he stayed in that position for quite a while until at one point, the staffs and Donghae (who happened to be at the studio too today) came in and consoled him to stop crying. lol at the amount of tears that I shed when the screen showed the empty seats after the prog finished and when I started to realise that there's no more EunTeuk DJ banner at the back like before.

It took me a while to close the Sukira tab when it finished although there's nothing more at the screen. Idk, I....just can't believe it's already over. If Sukira's a child, we were the ones who watched this child grow. It's painful to see how this child being passed to someone else's hands now. I know it's even harder for the 2 DJs to accept this as Sukira hold a great meaning for them; they started DJ-ing a few months after their debut which is on 2005. This is a place that they go for every weekdays from 10 to 12, a place where they share everything that can't be told in broadcast shows, a place that they can be their true self.

I know I'm not there since the beginning but after 3 years knowing them, streaming Sukira have become routine for every weeks. It's those time when I can really feel their existance. How is their days at that side of the world, tired or not, their schedules, the stories about their fellow brothers etc. The feel is like listening to two normal peole that are trying their best to cherish every moment with their listeners, not as the superstar and well known members of Super Junior. It's weird how their voices can easily change some of my days that wasn't at their best to be better.

They're too many things that I'll miss tbh. I can already expect this gonna happen as they said they wanted to take a short break 2 weeks ago. I know it's not going to be that 'short' as they claimed. The announcement of desicion that they made to stop DJ-ing few days ago seriously took me by surprise. It's just too sudden. But afterall I'm glad that Sungmin and Ryeowook are the one who are going to take over their seats after this, not other artists. Let's just hope the slot of 'Super Junior Kiss the Radio' will last forever. And to Leeteuk and Eunhyuk DJs, thank you for these wonderful 5 years and 3 months. Thank you for always accompanying me through the nights. It's great that we've come till this far. One more memory that I could cherish in this fandom. Because Sukira is just..........Sukira. It always has this special place in my heart. Please do come back soon as guests if not as DJ anymore. I know all these feelings won't fade that fast, but it will eventually heal.

The memories which were tearing my heart apart They’re now ripped off the calendar They’re fading as the year goes by I pretend to live forgetting you

Read more at:
Don't forget to take out with full credits
the memories which were tearing my heart apart,
they're now ripped off the calendar,
they're fading as the year goes by,
there's no more tomorrow,
till you come back, everyday is yesterday.
-Tablo, No Tomorrow

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Thursday, December 1, 2011


What is this fuss about MO.A Concert D:

OTL everyone is talking about it. Looks like I need to keep myself away from laptop for a few days. Can't stand to see the amount of updates about the concert /cries/ Guys the groups that are coming are all my favourite ;_; Miss A, B1A4, f(x) and yeah SUPER JUNIOR. MY BOYS ARE IN THE SAME COUNTRY AS ME AND WE'RE BREATHING THE SAME FRIGGIN AIR. WE'RE LIKE FREAKING CLOSE YET SO FAR ADSJKLPMRT IDE. TELL ME WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH MY LIFE. I want to meet them so bad tsktsk. I don't understand why I didn't buy the tix. What am I thinking at that time D8 Well act I was thinking to save money for SS4 plus there's a rumour that said they probably won't come to Malaysia for this tour. That means I need to go to Singapore if I want to see them once again. So yeah, money man. I need to save money if this is true. But I feel a slight regret for not buying the MO.A tix now. Amani and I made a plan to buy the concert and flight tix few days ago lol. But what to do it's too late now. I'll def go if I were in KL because they give 50% disc now as the tickets are not sold out :( Poor thing I live in Narnia which I need to consider so many things before going. Sigh, my fail life.

btw on a brighter note, I got my Perfection album yesterday! YAY! /dances/ I know I'm a bit late but err......just lemme spazz for this moment.

and yay I got Zhou Mimimimimimi's photocard! Hihi isn't he gorgeous?

I was watching Running Man in my room when mom suddenly shouted from the living room asking me what did I buy this time when she saw Pos Laju at the gate trololol XD Automatically burst out laughing in front of my mom because this is the 3rd/4th time that van came to my house in 2 WEEKS time bwahaha. rofl but no worries, mom understand her daughter very well so she never ban/stop me from buying this kind of stuff. Well my mom is cool n____n